The ninja of ancient times lived on the fringes of civilization in secret
hideouts in mountains and forests. You know, kinda like elves in Lord of the Rings. Except they didn't dress sissy. ANYWAYS,
they pretty much lived off the land which meant they ate lots of seeds and berries and tree barks and whatnot which they would
put in a bowl with some milk and thereby inventing the world's first cereal. Mostly the hungry ninja would lie in wait and
dropkick deer and rabbits and badgers or whatever forest creature would scurry their way. These would be made into burgers
or roasted over an open fire. All in all, ninjas ate pretty good which is why they were such awesome strong warriors. Even
the mighty yaks and emus feared the hungry ninja.
Thanks to today's food technology, modern ninjas don't have to dropkick
their dinner in the wild. Merchants now carry an ample supply of packaged meats for easy consumption. There are
two main meats all ninjas LOVE and carry in large quantities when on the go. One is beef jerky. Ninjas LOVE beef jerky. The
second is perhaps the most perfect food ever invented: Spam. This awesome taste sensation comes packed in a neat little square
can that's easy to carry and makes a great weapon. Look in any travelling ninja's pack and you'll find a pack of Oberto,
a can of Spam and a Faygo or two (cola or orange. Orange is the best).
Left: Ryuji combats a pimp who tries to purchase the last box of Frankenberry.